Try Something New

Each year many of us make New Year’s resolutions. Some vow to exercise more, lose weight, eat better, find a new job, be a better husband or wife, take a trip, etc. I admit that I have made many of these types of resolutions in the past. Sometimes I have been successful in adhering to them and sometimes not. But, whether I was successful or not, I always looked back and realized that I was thankful for each challenge, because it allowed me to build both my strength and character. I am not saying that I have great strength or character. I am simply saying that when I take on something new, challenging or something that may be outside of my innate abilities, I grow as a person both physically and mentally.

This year I decided to take on two new challenges both of which I have never attempted before. I am very nervous about my ability to succeed in both of these challenges. It would be very easy for me to be so intimidated by imagining all the worst-case scenarios that I wouldn’t even attempt them. As I have aged, I realized that life without new experiences is dull and boring. I also know that I don’t want to live a dull and boring life. So, I have been committed to challenging my comfort zone regularly in ways that are both challenging and, yes, intimidating. As I have taken on each challenge, I have learned something new about myself and have really enjoyed the resulting benefits.

The first of my two new challenges this year is taking on the role of Director of the Westborough Players Club’s Youth Musical which will go up in front of an audience on November 18, 19 and 20th. The Youth Musical is for kids from the age of 8-15 and is a way for our club to teach kids interested in theater about the process of putting on a full length musical by having them participate in a full production. My role as the director is to come up with the overall look of the show from the blocking, dance numbers (I thankfully have a choreographer), sets, lighting, etc. I have been in shows as an actor in the past and I have designed and built sets. I have just never been the overall director. I have never been the person that everyone looks to for, well, direction. It is a daunting task.

I spent over a month going over the script to come up with the blocking and where I wanted dances versus simple movement to music. I consulted with the costumers on the costumes I wanted the kids to wear. I got approval for the set design and have started putting it together. I went through the auditions process with my music director and choreographer. We cast 24 kids in the show. Now that rehearsals have started I have to say that I am so happy to have put in the prep time. It has helped my nerves and hopefully will result in a good production that the audience will enjoy. I am finding that the skills for planning and prep I have learned through my training for marathons have helped me realize that this challenge will help me to grow my skills and knowledge of what it takes to put on a musical. But, more importantly, it will help me believe I can accomplish anything if I put in the proper preparation and planning needed to succeed.

The second and more frightening challenge is helping a fellow runner achieve her goal of completing a marathon in less than 5 hours. My friend and fellow runner Helen Morey asked me last year if I would sign up for the Dana Farber Marathon Challenge (DFMC) in 2012 and help her complete the 116th Boston Marathon in less than 5 hours. Without thinking I agreed. I was accepted as a member of the DFMC Team and now am facing the challenge of helping Helen get ready for marathon and give her the proper training and coaching to help her shave over 1 hour off her best marathon finish.

As I think about the training program I am going craft for Helen, I realized that as her coach I will need to be fully committed to the job. I have the patience and love for running that will hopefully enable me to impart words of wisdom and motivation when she needs them. I know that for Helen to succeed, she is going to have to go through some very tough mental and physical training days. Knowing Helen these past 3 years, I have faith that her strong personality will be the key to keep her from quitting when the going gets tough. This coupled with our common sense of humor should help to make the training program fun. I want to make sure that Helen has fun during her training. But, I still am nervous about the challenge as I do not want to fail my friend.

As you can see, I am definitely getting out of my comfort zone over the next few months. I will be pushing my limits both physically and mentally. Hopefully, in the end this will make me stronger in both aspects of my life. There is that little bit of doubt that I am going to be able to succeed in both of these endeavors. Despite that doubt, I am ready to take them on and know that I will put in the time and effort needed to succeed. Even if for some reason neither challenge turns out the way I planned them, I will be satisfied in knowing that I gave it my all. The good news is that the kids in the show are working really hard and Helen is anything but a quitter. This makes me believe that in the end they will all make me proud to have been a part of the process that enabled them to succeed.

“Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are.”

Bernice Johnson Reagon

Sept. 29 – 6.20 miles (58:51, 9:30 pace)
Sept. 13 – 3.20 miles (25:12, 7:53 pace) – Speed Work
Sept. 14 – 8.10 miles (1:09:36, 8:26 pace) – Tempo Run, Manhattan, KS
Sept. 16 – 6.20 miles (57:06, 9:13 pace)
Sept. 17 – 10.10 miles (1:30:01, 8:55 pace)
Sept. 18 – 10.10 miles (1:30:13, 8:56 pace)
Sept. 19 – 6.10 miles (57:57, 9:30 pace)
Sept. 20 – 3.20 miles (25:27, 7:57 pace) – Speed Work
Sept. 21 – 8.10 miles (1:09:14, 8:33 pace) – Tempo Run, Orlando, FL
Sept. 24 – 6.20 miles (Unknown) – Hike to the top of Mt. Monadnock, NH
Sept. 25 – 8.20 miles (1:14:29, 9:05 pace)

Total Miles: 75.7 miles
2011 YTD Miles: 1,213.5 miles

10 Years After

On November 22, 1963, John F. Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas. I was 2 years old. I can remember as I got older and would discuss history with my parents, they told me they would always remember where they were and how they felt when they heard the news that Kennedy was killed by an assassin's bullet as his motorcade wound through Dallas. This was probably the same for my grandparents when they heard the news about Pearl Harbor on December 7, 1941. As I grew older I was somewhat comforted by the fact that the history that was unfolding in my lifetime was mostly good. The Cold War had ended and the Berlin Wall came down. I actually began to feel a sense of relief believing that maybe what John Lennon had asked for in 1969 was actually going to take hold in my lifetime. Maybe the world was really going to "give peace a chance."

Unfortunately, when I returned home from my normal morning run on Sept. 11, 2001, I realized that I had been mistaken. Here I was 40 years old and being confronted with what hatred and intolerance had wrought in my world. As I witnessed the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center and Pentagon, I realized that like my parents in 1963, I would always remember that exact moment in time, where I was, how I felt and many things after that. Sadly, watching the events unfold as I got ready for work was not going to be the end of my connection with the event. I hate to admit the fact that I have been avoiding any discussions about that day ever since I finally switched off the coverage, stopped reading the papers and walked away from the memorial service at the Old Globe Theater for my friend Tim Ward who was on United Flight #175. I wanted to remember it in my own way not the way the media and the rest of the world wanted me to. But, here we are 10 years later and I cannot avoid the onslaught of stories no matter how hard I may try.

So here I am on the 10th Anniversary of 9/11. Ten years ago, I did my normal morning run not knowing what was happening on the East Coast. Today I did an 8 mile training run in preparation for the B.A.A. Half Marathon. Another normal morning run like so many I have completed in the last 10 years. The difference today is that I ran with the memories of that day and my friend and colleague who perished. As I reflected on that day, I realized that we all move through life touching others in ways we may not even realize. Tim Ward and I were not extremely close. We worked together and socialized after work many times. I always remember his fantastic cheesecakes he would bring into the office for special occasions and his sincere happy attitude about life. But, I suspect he didn’t know how many people’s lives he and touched and left each with a positive lasting memory of him.

What I find sad is that despite all that Tim had done in the short 38 years he lived the tributes to him and many of the other victims are short, have very little detail and don’t do them justice. Here are two examples:

Timothy Ward, 38, of San Diego, California, worked at the Carlsbad, California-based Rubio's Restaurants Inc. A 14-year veteran of the company, he opened its second restaurant in San Diego and most recently worked in the information technology department.

And

Tim Ward, 38, of San Diego, was an information technology executive for Rubio's Restaurants, a chain of 138 Mexican restaurants headquartered in Carlsbad, Calif. A wine enthusiast and sports lover, Ward loved attending San Diego's Old Globe Theater, a reproduction of the Tudor-era Theater that presents Shakespearean plays. Recently, he'd sent his grandmother flowers.

I know Tim was much more than these simple biographies. But, this is how we remember our loved ones when they pass on. A few simple sentences to try and sum up what they spent a lifetime trying to create in this world.

Running is a way for me to be in the moment and to reflect on my memories. What I realized this morning as I reflected on my memories of that day is that I did change profoundly on that day 10 years ago. I realized that I should embrace life and live it to its fullest. Ever since that day I have challenged myself both physically and mentally and have really had more fun. I have met new people and befriended many of them and am so blessed to have them in my life for they make it much richer. I have climbed mountains, completed 5 marathons, run 2 – 200 mile relay races, got back into acting, etc. This made me realize that even out of such a tragedy some good can come from it. I recently reread “On the Road” and found this quote to best sum up how my philosophy of life has changed since September 11, 2001:

"But why think about that when all the golden lands ahead of you and all kinds of unforeseen events wait lurking to surprise you and make you glad you're alive to see?" — Jack Kerouac (On the Road)

Run on my friends and find those golden lands that hold wonder and surprise that must not be missed.

Aug. 22 – 6.20 miles (57:18, 9:15 pace)
Aug. 23 – 3.20 miles (25:09, 7:52 pace) – Speed Work
Aug. 25 – 7.20 miles (57:33, 7:59 pace) – Tempo Run
Aug. 26 – 7.10 miles (1:07:, 9:26 pace)
Aug. 27 – 6.20 miles (53:41, 8:40 pace)
Aug. 28 – 12.10 miles (1:55:09, 9:31 pace)
Aug. 29 – 6.10 miles (56:58, 9:21 pace)
Aug. 30 – 3.20 miles (25:18, 7:55 pace) – Speed Work
Sept. 1 – 7.20 miles (58:09, 8:04 pace) – Tempo Run
Sept. 2 – 6.10 miles (56:04, 9:12 pace)
Sept. 3 – 10.10 miles (1:32:30, 9:10 pace)
Sept. 4 – 8.10 miles (1:18:08, 9:39 pace)
Sept. 5 – 6.20 miles (55:17, 8:55 pace)
Sept. 6 – 3.20 miles (25:00, 7:48 pace) – Speed Work
Sept. 8 – 7.20 miles (57:35, 7:59 pace) – Tempo Run
Sept. 9 – 7.10 miles (1:05:33, 9:14 pace)
Sept. 10 – 14.30 miles (2:09:09, 9:02 pace)
Sept. 11 – 8.10 miles (1:14:17, 9:10 pace)

Total Miles: 128.9 miles
2011 YTD Miles: 1,137.8 miles

P.S. If you click on the tile it will bring you to a great song by the band 10 Years After.

Irene and Turning 50

When I started writing this entry, I was going to focus on the fact that on Sept. 1, I will move up into the next age bracket for my races. Yep, I am going to officially be a “senior runner”. Somehow I found a way to hang on to my running through my 40’s and am still consistently training with no end in sight. I am a committed runner who has through trial and error found a way to train correctly and have even been asked to advise other runners on their training. But, instead a little weather pattern has taken over our consciousness here in New England the past few days -- Hurricane Irene.

As I followed the news stories this past week, I realized that much like getting older there was really nothing I could do about Irene. It was coming to visit me no matter what I did. All I could do was prepare for it. I would move all the patio furniture off my deck. I would lash down my gas grill so it wouldn't become a flying projectile. I would get a few more canned goods and some water in case we lose power or the public water system becomes contaminated. Other than that, nothing was going to stop the inevitable. Just like turning 50, Irene would be here and I would just have to deal with whatever it brought me.

With that thought in mind, I have decided that I am going to look on this milestone as my entry into my “golden years” of running. I have now been running since 1985. It has become a huge part of my life. My goal as a “senior runner” is to keep running long term which means I need to emphasize consistency. I am hopeful that this will allow me to remain fit and stay injury free. I still want to have a chance to run a marathon with my son Nathan when he is ready to tackle the distance. Much like Irene I plan to howl and rage against my impending fitness decline as I age. I will not go gentle into that good night.

That is quite a bold statement. I will admit it is strange turning 50. I don’t feel 50. Of course, I am not sure what it is supposed to feel like. I am still able to do everything I have always done. I can still run long distances. I am able to recover from hard efforts without any problem. I know that it is true that age will eventually catch up with me but there is no reason why my performance should fall off dramatically in the future. I actually set my marathon PR when I was 47. I have always read that as a runner I have to accept that there will be a certain deterioration of my fitness level with age. But, I am convinced that my routine is staving off the deterioration or at least slowing it down. Research has shown that by slightly increasing, or at least maintaining, "quality" training I can limit my age-induced loss in aerobic capacity to 4 or 5 percent per decade rather than the "normal" 10 percent. Now that is something to strive for.

I decided that if my turning 50 was not going to stop me from running neither was Irene. I got up at 5:00 am and the winds and rain were very light and calm. I headed out for a 12 mile training run as part of my preparation for the B.A.A. Half Marathon. The streets were deserted and it was eerily calm. I ran on through the rain and light winds. I got back to my house just as the rain started to pick up and the winds started to blow harder. There is more wind and rain headed our way. I am not worried. I will sit in my house and look out the window knowing that this almost 50 year old went out and completed his run for the day and feel satisfied that I can still do something that I love. Bring it on Irene and I want you all to know that I see 50 as just the beginning of my new life as a "senior runner".

Aug. 8 – 6.00 miles (53:35, 8:56 pace)
Aug. 9 – 3.20 miles (25:29, 7:58 pace) – Speed Work
Aug. 11 – 6.20 miles (49:09, 7:56 pace) – Tempo Run
Aug. 12 – 6.10 miles (53:08, 8:43 pace)
Aug. 13 – 7.10 miles (1:02:27, 8:48 pace)
Aug. 14 – 10.20 miles (1:31:19, 8:57 pace)
Aug. 15 – 6.20 miles (57:21, 9:15 pace)
Aug. 16 – 3.20 miles (25:28, 7:58 pace) – Speed Work
Aug. 18 – 6.20 miles (49:34, 8:01 pace) – Tempo Run
Aug. 19 – 6.20 miles (56:43, 9:09 pace)
Aug. 20 –8.20 miles (1:13:28 8:58 pace)
Aug. 21 –8.10 miles (1:11:52, 8:52 pace)

Total Miles: 76.9 miles
2011 YTD Miles: 1,008.9 miles

The Ebb and Flow of Motivation

It has been a month since I ran in the 2011 Mass Dash Relay. While it was a really great experience, it really took its mental toll. I have struggled the past few weeks trying to get back into my running mindset. I do not crave my runs like I did prior to competing in that race. Regardless of the malaise I have been feeling, I signed up to run the B.A.A. Half Marathon again in October and really need to get myself into peak form so that I can improve my performance on that course. If I don't it could be a very tough day on the road.

This past week, I really focused on sticking to my training regimen. I found comfort in getting up and doing whatever was on my training plan for the day. But each run was a struggle. I didn't feel bad on my runs at all. In fact, I was running pretty well. It was just that there seemed to be this little devil on my shoulder telling me to just quit. Stop running. I kept asking myself why was I feeling like I wanted to pack it in during the middle of a tough workout? Sadly, I don't know where this feeling is coming from.

As I thought about it, I realized that it is not uncommon for a runner like me to have difficulty staying motivated. I am just feeling a bit of burnout. I realized that I had fallen into a rut and my burnout is coming from stale training habits and a simple mental let down after competing in a race I really wasn't properly prepared to run. However, running is a very important part of my life and who I am as a person. So, I am going to chose to see this symptom of burnout as a blessing in disguise. I am going to refocus my training and work harder to be adequately prepared for the B.A.A. Half Marathon.

If I work hard and do well in the B.A.A. Half Marathon, it will be a good indicator of the running shape I am in before the start of my training for the Dana Farber Marathon Challenge Team in 2012. I have realized that my motivation to train is not a constant feeling that is always there 100% of the time. It ebbs and flows depending on whatever else is happening in my life. The key thing I need to remember is that even when I am not feeling particularly motivated to get out there that running is part of who I am and how important it is to me. I need to just lace up my shoes, do my run and wait for that motivation to come back. I am going to remind myself that my goals as a runner are part of a long journey and the malaise I have been feeling is just momentary blip on the screen that will soon dissipate.

I know that every runner has struggled with staying motivated and reaching their goals. Finding the motivation to stick with my training isn't necessarily easy, but I know I can do it. Writing this blog and telling the world that I am running the B.A.A. Half Marathon will help me stay motivated as you will be wondering how I did in the race. I can also reenergize my passion by sticking to my training schedule, and reminding myself of how much I really love to run. That's really what it's really all about. I love to run and I do it because it is fun. Therefore, I am going to make my new running mantra - No fun, no run!

Jul. 24 – 6.20 miles (55:02, 8:53 pace)
Jul. 25 – 6.20 miles (57:01, 9:12 pace)
Jul. 26 – 3.50 miles (30:17, 8:39 pace) – Speed Work
Jul. 28 – 5.20 miles (41:45, 8:02 pace) – Tempo Run
Jul. 30 – 9.10 miles (1:21:15, 8:56 pace)
Jul. 31 – 9.00 miles (1:19:07, 8:48 pace)
Aug. 1 – 6.10 miles (55:12, 9:02 pace)
Aug. 2 – 3.20 miles (25:11, 7:52 pace) – Speed Work
Aug. 4 – 6.20 miles (49:49, 8:02 pace) – Tempo Run
Aug. 5 – 7.10 miles (1:04:06, 9:02 pace)
Aug. 1 –7.10 miles (1:04:32, 9:05 pace)

Total Miles: 68.9 miles
2011 YTD Miles: 932.0 miles